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today i miss my garden. but i have big dreams for my little patch of land here in fredericksburg. i already have a raised bed planted with garlic and two pots with spinach growing. but my greedy heart wants more, more, more! once the holidays have passed and winter settles in, i will begin to plan and work on the garden to come. i have received two seed catalogues in the mail. they are so beautiful to look at but also a little overwhelming. too many choices but i am thankful for such biodiveristy (which is hard to come by in your average grocery store).

along with missing my garden, i am finding myself having mini panic attacks in the grocery store or target or almost any store to be exact. i find myself thinking of how far the food traveled to get to my kitchen or where my purchase was made or how many resources were expended to make x,y, and z. this especially bothers me this time of year. we are a culture of consuming with the rarity of actually having to expend time, resources, energy (other than money and the time it took to earn it) to make that thing we are consuming. if we actually had to grow, produce, make what we have we would have so much LESS and be in so much LESS debt (as an individual, community, country).  and we would probably be TONS more satisfied.

i do not want the american lifestyle. i do not want the american dream. i do not want the culture outside my doorstep.

but it is so hard to fight it. to really consider where things were made and by whom and with what resources. it’s easier just to buy it, eat it, consume it, stuff it in the closet, use it up and throw it away.

but this system can’t last forever. we all know it. so are we going to suck it dry or fight back? i hope to give birth to and adopt and raise the next generation. and i was called to care for this planet. so i think i will fight back.

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